(seen at the performance on 4th September 2025)
On 13th November 2025, Whoopi Goldberg turns 70. From the energy she displays on stage, you wouldn’t begin to estimate that she is anywhere near that age.
Yet, as she tells us right at the start, menopause is over and so is most of her interest in younger men (over 60). A trail of dust follows her creaking walk and those she holds dear are leaving her.
The first half of the show is part stand-up comedy, part wisdom – without more than two sips of water... for obvious reasons.
It rambles, ebbs and flows, references to a “prompt book” either designed to give her a break from speaking or just vary things a little.
No matter, the stories are fun. From how to deal with a snotty-nosed brat on the train (she is out of jail now), to a long and beautifully told set-piece about her brother’s passing, her mother’s wisdom about confronting life, and on to the most important advice of all...
... “Like f**k I can’t” should be your response to anything you are told you cannot do.
Second half, two comfy yellow chairs on stage for a chat with her Irish friend Graham Norton (compelling in his chat show personna, no researchers so he Googles it all).
Asked about the role she would most like to repeat, her answer is that there are none – she wants to do new work.
“Doctor Who” is the character she has her eye on, but feels it “too British”. A cry of “Like f**k I can’t” from the audience – and given the current state of that TV series, we have to hope someone is listening to give her the job.
The story of how the producers of “Ghost” didn’t even want her to try out for the biggest role for a Black actor in Hollywood brings gasps. How her life changed, and she changed it for her mother when success arrived, simple humility. We don't find out what the pelt was, alas (you had to be there as the audience shouted suggestions).
Honest explanations about what can go wrong catching a star on a bad day is another truth told.
And that sums up Whoopi Goldberg. Wearing a customised colour-cloud T-shirt from an organisation promoting women in sport, her warmth reached out from the stage to the very back of the vast Hammersmith Apollo auditorium.
Special moments involved a woman in the stalls passing a pillow printed with the photograph of her late mother to the stage, at Whoopi’s prompting.
Later, a man (whose partner sent Graham Norton a question to be asked), dissolved into tears coming forward to meet the idol whose face he has tattooed twice on his arm. A Christmas gift, he sobbed as Goldberg knelt on stage to embrace him.
Stars have something undefinable which make them so. This show may have been way too short and somewhat lacking in superficial structure. What makes it unmissable is the lady who makes magic happen just by being there.
The monkey was so glad it was too.
5 stars, standing ovation given.