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Only Fools And Horses The Musical


Theatre Royal, Haymarket

18 Suffolk Street, London SW1Y 4HT 020 7930 8800

Only Fools and Horses The Musical
  • Synopsis
  • Theatremonkey show opinion
  • Reader reviews
  • Performance schedule
  • Ticket prices

16th March 2020.
At this time there are NO performances of ANY production taking place in the West End or other London venues.

Stay safe, stay well.

Brothers Del and Rodney live with Grandad in Nelson Mandela House, Peckham. Through ducking and diving, one day they may become millionaires.

The classic BBC TV sitcom comes to the stage.

(seen at the afternoon performance on 30th March 2019). Some actors have now left the cast.
Appropriate to the blessed memory of the TV show's ethos, this is a total knock-off version. It falls to bits after a couple of hours, through no fault of the hapless cast.

Mixing solid gold old tunes with (mostly) weak new ones makes the shine fade even quicker than usual. Odd exceptions glitter for a moment - "The Girl" is almost acceptable, "Where have All The Cockneys Gone?" a good try if the sound mixing desk (misfiring on all cylinders throughout) had let even us in the front row hear it properly. For the rest, a slightly warped David Bowie LP is a better listen, really.

Capping the musical theatre effort, director and choreographers Caroline Jay Ranger and Denise Ranger raise a small smile at one point, but otherwise appears to have overdosed on "cockney cabaret." Their programme credits suggest "The Commitments" in London and "Faulty Towers Live" in Australia as the peak of their experience. While their "Early Doors" was fine, sadly, it doesn't seem sufficient for the task this show requires.

Luckily, set and costume designer Liz Ascroft gives us a pretty fun revolving affair, with some smart signage. Did note the "remote controls" had fallen through a time worm-hole, though. Tim Blazdell does well with anarchic graphics distracting from a particularly vulgar and witless interlude in act two.

Of the performances: Tom Bennet is fine as Del Boy, capturing the spirit of a wide-boy with heart if not quite the exuberance. Ryan Hutton's Rodney impression isn't helped by the lack of gormless string-bean appearance, but as his voice settles and his character gets a decent emotional journey, there's an appealing growth in stage presence to match. Completing the trio, Paul Whitehouse as Grandad is the standard-issue impression, and as writer he does give himself the best monologue in the show.

For the ladies, Dianne Pilkington shines as Raquel, giving the already mentioned "The Girl" the best number in the show full value. Pippa Duffy's Cassandra is given little to do, but she takes the role with charm... though cycle-shorts may be in order (the front row angle in one scene, well...).

In supporting roles, Jeff Nicholson is a beefy Boycie, Samantha Seager nicely trashy as Marlene - and both deliver their big scene without betraying the professional embarrassment it is probably causing them.

Nice work from Peter Baker as Trigger - timing his lines with ease; a convincing Denzil in Adrian Irvine and not nearly enough of Chris Kiely and Andy Mace as Mickey Pearce and Mike The Barman respectively. Melanie Marshall has a good voice and neat characterisation as Mrs Obooko, and a touch of "Legally Blonde" as the Wedding Fitter. Pete Gallagher and Adam Venus as the Driscoll brothers also convince, while Osca Conlon-Morrey outwits nicely the script in a variety of roles.

The text they all get is a sloppy mixture of television references and plots, burning out around two scenes into the second half. Padding keeps the show afloat until the final two sequences - and the monkey felt even they were not worth waiting for. There are bright moments, but scattered and unworthy of the great legacy they intend to preserve. "Cash-in" is sadly closer to it.

A more experienced new musical theatre team would surely have known what was wrong and fixed the entire show out-of-town with extensive try-outs and revisions that would re-mould the first act and re-write the second to the extent required. As it is, this will sell out on the name alone, but it's a massive missed opportunity.

Legacy reader reviews

Will appear here.

The monkey advises checking performance times on your tickets and that performances are happening as scheduled, before travelling.

Monday to Saturday at 7.30pm
Wednesday and Saturday at 2.30pm and 7.30pm

Runs 2 hours 30 minutes approximately.

 

Theatres use "dynamic pricing." Seat prices change according to demand for a particular performance. Prices below were compiled as booking originally opened. Current prices are advised at time of enquiry.


Monday to Thursday
Stalls

Rows A to T: £77.50 except:
"Premium Seats" row F 1 to 18; G 3 to 19; H and K 3 to 20, L 3 to 18: £105
"Package Seats" row M 1 to 18: £127.50
Rows V to X: £67.50

Dress Circle
centre block
Rows F to H: £77.50
"Premium Seats" rows A to E: £105

side blocks
All seats £77.50 except:
"Premium Seats" row A 8 to 11, 21 to 24; B 5 to 8, 20 to 23: £105
Row A 3 to 7, 25 to 29; B and C 1 to 4, B 24 to 27, C 25 to 28; D 1 to 3, 25, 26, 27; E 1, 2, 26 and 27; F 1 and 26: £67.50
two pairs of restricted view seats on the edges of row A 1, 2, 30, 31: £35

Upper Circle
centre block rows A to F: £47.50 except:
restricted view row A 15, 16, 23, 24; B 10, 11, 20, 21 and C 8, 9, 19, 20: £25
Row G: £35

Upper Circle Restricted View side blocks rows A to D four seats nearest centre aisle and all of rows E and F: £25
Upper Circle Restricted View side blocks all other seats: £15 if sold.

Balcony
All seats: £20

Boxes
B and C: £77.50 per seat
A: £125 per seat (with package)


Friday and Saturday
Stalls

Rows A to T: £87.50 except:
"Premium Seats" row F 1 to 18; G 3 to 19; H and K 3 to 20, L 3 to 18: £137.50
"Package Seats" row M 1 to 18: £155
Rows V to X: £77.50

Dress Circle
centre block
Rows F to H: £87.50
"Premium Seats" rows A to E: £137.50

side blocks
All seats £87.50 except:
"Premium Seats" row A 8 to 11, 21 to 24; B 5 to 8, 20 to 23: £137.50
Row A 3 to 7, 25 to 29; B and C 1 to 4, B 24 to 27, C 25 to 28; D 1 to 3, 25, 26, 27; E 1, 2, 26 and 27; F 1 and 26: £87.50
two pairs of restricted view seats on the edges of row A 1, 2, 30, 31: £40

Upper Circle
centre block rows A to F: £50 except:
restricted view row A 15, 16, 23, 24; B 10, 11, 20, 21 and C 8, 9, 19, 20: £25
Row G: £40

Upper Circle Restricted View side blocks rows A to D four seats nearest centre aisle and all of rows E and F: £25
Upper Circle Restricted View side blocks all other seats: £15 if sold.

Balcony
All seats: £20

Boxes
B and C: £87.50 per seat
A: £155 per seat (with package)




Some details may change. The monkey will update as available.

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